April 10th, Bye for now

I'm taking a bus to Mexico City tonight. I don't know who I'll be staying with in the city, but I'm going, and getting a plane on Friday at some point. At least that is the plan right now.
I told Fernando and Irma about leaving this morning. I said in Spanish, "I needed to talk to both of you. I am going home tonight or tomorrow morning. I need my family right now. I'll return around the beginning of May."
Irma said that Felix had mentioned that last night to her but was waiting for me to bring it up. Fernando kind of shook his head. I couldn't tell if it was in disappointment or because he was sorry for the reason I would be going now. I felt like he was disappointed.
I kind of just sat at the table while the two of them got ready. Fernando came back out of his room and said I looked upset and wanted to know what else was going on. The truth was that I felt he was disappointed I was cutting out so early..like I was quitting. I told him I was sorry I was leaving, for both of us I was sorry. He gave me the pat on the knee like it would be ok and he wasn't mad. I sat some more cutting up and eating my pineapple. He came back over and without saying anything, gave me the most heartfelt hug. I hugged him back equally as strong, and just cried.
I have found something so unique here, I would be insane not to come back. This family has shown me a love unlike anything I've ever felt and exposed me to a world sans excessiveness. I feel like I've found another home in the world with people who will love me no matter what.
I'm sad to be going so soon after my arrival but know I'll return. I can't not return.
It isn't an option.

April 9th, Veracruz

I went to the grand ole city of Veracruz today. I tagged along for a doctors visit with Felix (the English Teacher in Tecolutla) and his friend Fernando (who drove and speaks no English). Its about a 4 hour trek from Tecolutla to Veracruz so there was some good napping on the way there, and much listening to my new found love..Marc Anthony. Fernando played a CD of his in the car and then put on some awful Mexican music (I probably think it's awful because the people who live next to my cabin play that crap into the wee hours of the morning, every morning.) When the CD had finished, I told Fernando I really liked the first CD, whoever it was. He had a nicer voice. Needless to say, I'm now obsessed with M.A.
We stopped about 2 hours into the trip at the eatery they regularly eat at when they go to Veracruz. It's on the side of the road next to a speed bump (I HATE THOSE THINGS) and has checkered plastic coverings on the tables. Thats all you can really say about it. I wasn't hungry though, but not being Fernando or Irma and understanding my eating habits, they insisted. I ate spicy quesadillas (everything is spicy even when you ask for it without spicy). My stomach is still re-cooping from in's infection so it took the quesadillas, but not happily.
Felix and Fernando wanted to drive around before going to the hospital so I could see the area. There was this amazing billboard for Coca-Cola and a ton of boats. Oh and soccer nets on the beaches. I took a picture of the billboard so I can put it up here when I figure out how to do that. And when I say amazing, I mean God awful. It's a bunch of drunk girls with their tongues out and sporting really trashy club outfits. Good work Coca Cola. I thought it was silly, especially to be displayed on a giant billboard. Oh and for those who are not familiar with the map of southern Mexico, like myself, Veracruz is south of Tecolutla which means it's considerably hotter. Let's just say I was sweaty all day.
Now for the hospital scene. If I had known how un-organized and frustrating the hospital was going to be, I would have insisted on some beach time prior to the visit. To sum things up, we sat in a hallway with about 40 other people, and waited for 3 hours. I watched at least 100 nurses walk up and down the hall going to lunch or going home. They have a very strange way of working things down here. It makes me grateful for our hospital system (you know..the make the appointment, show up for appointment, go home). Here, the doctors all get to the hospital around 3 so you have mass amounts of people getting there 3-5 hours early, like ourselves, in order to secure a good spot when the doctor does finally get there. Right before he does arrive, however, a nurse asks for your slips which you had been given when you checked in. Everyone rushes to a door and waits in that line to have their actual name put on an ordered list to see the doctor. Then you go back to your seat and wait some more. Oh and Ps these aren't cushy comfy chairs. I'm talking a wooden bench, and some plastic seats. Naturally, not everyone can sit down though. There isn't enough room. When the doctor starts down the hall to the examining room, everyone visibly perks up, eyes following his every step. Then there is a little bit of a sinking feeling. you have at least 4 other people in front of you to be examined. SO you wait a little bit longer.
Surprisingly, with all this waiting, people are in generally good spirits. Not dancing and singing, but smiling and talking with one another. (Ps as I'm writing this, it has just hit the midnight spot on the clock. My wonderful neighbors have started what sounds like Kareoke. C'MON)
Anyway, back to the people. They are pleasant. They all look out for one another, making getting into lines and reserving your place not as cut-throat as it could possibly be. It's a pleasant environment.
During the 3 hours, I talked to Fernando and Felix, and then got really bored. I listened to my iPod and tried to change the mood of people walking in crowded masses up and down the hall with each song. Hotel by Broken Social Scene was lovely, as was Cowboy by Kid Rock.
When it was Felix's turn, I would guesstimate that he was in and out of the room within 15 minutes.
Afterwards, everyone, except myself, was really hungry. We went to a fried chicken stand with homemade tortillas and crunchy dry soap in the bathroom (seriously, as least this place had soap. THE HOSPITAL DIDN'T HAVE SOAP IN ITS RESTROOMS!)
After dinner, which took place around 4 30pm, we left to get back to Tecolutla. I like car rides. This one was great. Fernando let that Marc Anthony CD from heaven play at least 3 full times. When I recognized he was only letting it play for my personal enjoyment, I realized what a wonderful car of people I was with.
But Somewhere between sitting and pondering for 3 hours at the hospital, and sitting for 4 hours and pondering on the way home, I decided I really needed to go home, regardless of what I was doing here. My family is currently coping with the loss of my Grandpa (Dad's Dad). We lost him on Tuesday the 8th. My family also lost another grandparent, My Bubby, on Saturday, March 30th. Both deaths were caused by inoperable Cancer.
Since that Saturday I've wanted to be at home with my family, but knowing my cause down here is great has kept me going and kept me strong. With my Grandpa gone now, I need to go home to my family. I plan on returning to Tecolutla before Katie Davis (is working with TTPP) arrives in May, but right now I need to be at home with the people I love most in the world. With the people who gave me this opportunity in the first place.

April 7th, I make a new friend!..and that´s about it!

So today I'm feeling better. I didn't sleep until 2 in the afternoon which was a great start and actually had breakfast in the morning. I ate with Fernando and a new face, Juan. Juan is a character, and a wonderful one at that. He's a 40 year old Aquarius (The Mexicans, as I have come to find, are all about astrology. and I love it.) He's made his money by travelling the world as a sports fisherman, almost like George Bush, except classier and without that silly title of President (oh it doesn't look good to be on this sports fishing show while I'm in office..? Okie dokie.) He's married to his best friend, they claim residency in Mexico City, and with her support, and that of other friends, he's undergoing Gastric Bypass Surgery on May 6th. Fernando was in and out of the room so he missed the complete life story of this man. He lived in Mexico City as a tot, and then moved to Texas for the remainder of his childhood. He played every sport out there and was good at them. When he moved back to Mexico, he went to the lovely state of Veracruz, where in a nut shell, he hit rock bottom. He developed bad habits, did morally wrong things, and was headed down a pretty bad track. As an Aquarius, he tells me, their head is in the stars all the time. Always concocting out of this world dreams to fulfill. So when he decided he was tired of the drugs and needed to change his life for the better, he touched the ground. Without rehab, he was able to unite his stars and the earth and has made quite the life for himself. He speaks Spanish, English, and French very well. He can get by in Greece (He tells me their hand motions are all the same as those of Spanish business men), and really wants to learn German. He has alot of business there and loves the language. He also has business in Germany, Greece, France, Mexico, Florida, and Canada (I'm probably forgetting some). He works with U of Miami and U of Florida's Marine Biology department. He's got a kind heart and a bright future. He's nervous about his upcoming surgery. Well not so much the surgery, but the after math. He has work he needs to do to support his family and maintain his career and without an exact date from the doctors of when he'll get better, he's nervous thinking about his business.

Whenever I've met older people here (and not really old, just people who've experienced life) I always take it as if I'm getting a life lesson. For instance, the other night with Fernando and Irma's friend Stella, she told me to be free forever and to not get married. She told me to live with someone because that is a beautiful experience but getting married isn't good and will weigh down your soul when it's ready to fly again. Juan told me when I was ready to marry, to marry my best friend. Not someone I was only in love with because that would never last. Someone who knew me inside and out and would love me regardless of my appearance, mood, or financial state. Bertilde, without directly telling me what not to do, showed me what I didn't want to do. Never to waste brilliance. Whether it's within myself, or others. Hiding your gifts from the world does no good for anyone. I've learned about culture and astrology, and develped relationships with so many people. And for those of you who think Astrology is wack, you have another thing coming. Go get a legit birth chart done and then come back to me. The one I had in the very beginning of 2008 was frighteningly on target. She said I would be travelling alot within the next 6 - 8 months. She said I love people, and have a passion for languages (something I didn't think was true until I got here. Now it's totally true) and also that I would possibly work in the Government-a job position capable of making a global difference. As I'm not sure about the government part right now, the language, and travelling part is so on target it's scary. I've been to Texas, Mexico, Bar Harbor Maine, San Diego, Mexico (the reprise), and I'll be back here to Cancun in July. After that I'm going to North Carolina for a wedding, and with planning, hopefully up to Canada. All of this will have taken place by the end of the summer. Yeah and I'm not one of those people who plans my life around birth charts because that would be a waste of money. Life just sort of happened this way.
Juan gave me his card and said he would be back May 1st. There was going to be a big Tarpin showing (whatever that is) and that I should really come out and see them. Apparently they are giant fish, that starting next year, will be illegal to kill - only a catch and release kind of deal. Juan really hopes for this. Sport fishing is a whole new world and actually something a little interesting to me now. I can see how it is a legit sport and feel a little more educated on something I never thought I would get a lesson in.

After breakfast, the rest of the day was pretty laid back. Fernando and I went to the next town to do some grocery shopping. We came back and I started working on a blog post. I got kind of tired so I layed down for a bit and read. If you think any of what I'm doing is cool, you should definately read Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. The telling of the life changing year this woman had is incredible and inspiring and really a must-read for those who love travel and wished they did more. AJ KIEHNER READ THIS BOOK PLEASE. SPECIFICALLY YOU. I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH AND YOU NEED TO READ THIS.

After I finished my book I felt really good. I love finishing books, especially when i feel I've learned something about myself in the process. I made Aurorita a CD of some American music after that. The girl Denise that I had met on the bus when I was coming down to Tecolutla said that listening to American music at such a young age really improved her english, so I decided to try and give Aurorita that same advantage. I gave her the essentials: Avril, BBMack, John Mayer, Kelly Clarkson, Justin Timberlake,...High School Musical. I think there were a couple others but I gave her the proper tools to learn some basic songs..none of that DMX stuff. We don't want her to be a potty mouth, don't cha know.

So you may be wondering how I got here

I've decided to clear up a question that many of you probably have: What has brought me to this point in my life where I felt I needed to leave America and save Sea Turtles in Mexico? So for the good amount of people now reading my blog that weren't with me during the month of August 2007 and my first semester at Temple University, I would like to explain how I got here. This is something I've thought about alot. Before, when it felt like this trip was running away from hurt, I felt I was constantly justifying my trip. Now I see that although it was an escape route to begin with, it has blossomed into something so beautiful and life-changing, I can't even express how happy I am to be learning and living here. With the support of my Mom and Dad, both of my wonderful brothers, and the rest of my family and friends who have shown me nothing but enthusiastic support, am I here now writing to you all.

I guess the idea that I wanted to do something that was completely the opposite of what I had planned, hatched upon my break-up with the first serious (or legit as we say) boyfriend. Yeah insert whatever comments you please, but it honestly did change my life. This happened at the beginning of August while on vacation. Naturally I was a mess of emotion from pissed off and vengeful to broken and silent. No one around me really knew what to do or say except sit with me on Stag Island's pretty beach. I hated myself and him and felt like I had just lost the most important part of my life within a minute of phone conversation.
My mom had called the next day from PA to just see what was going on. She asked how Canada was doing so innocently, I erupted into little-girl-wanting-her-mommy tears and told her everything. Her voice was so soothing, I feel like it's a tone only a mother can take with her daughter when she is in hardcore pain. She could verbalize each emotion I had experienced throughout that day but also that there was another side and that I would get through it. My relationship with my Mom hadn't felt whole or happy for a very long time until this phone conversation. What no one could really say during those fragile days, my Mom expressed to me during this first of many phone conversations that helped more than I could ever reiterate. I know that without my break-up, the relationship and realization of love I wanted with my mom wouldn't have happened for God knows how long. At the rate our relationship reconstruction had been going, it could have very well been years. The love those around me in Canada and those who awaited my return home showed me was so strong and helped so much. One of my best friends even sped (as per usual) to my house to just be with me, before I said anything other than "we broke up."
After a few days, I knew I had to do something. Whether it was running away to Vancouver, Canada (becoming a certified event-planner at their Art-Insitute) or changing schools entirely (cleaning up my portfolio and applying to Moore College in Philadelphia), I knew I had to be doing something other than going to Temple U. Something that could keep my mind and heart occupied, when it just hurt.
Both my idea to go to Vancouver (way too radical) and applying to Moore College of Art and Design, a cultivated plan with the help of the glorious Olivia and momma Sutton-Smith, didn't happen for various reasons. Either ridiculous or impossible without an adequate portfolio. Although I would like to thank Joanne for all of the talks and tea she shared with me during my time at home last Fall. She is such a strong woman, proudly standing by her babies, hubby, and friends in times of pain and happiness, never missing a beat to give a hug, make you a beautiful card, or write a poem. I feel so blessed to know her and thank her a million times over for everything she has done for me.
I did go to Temple U, however, when move in day arrived. I moved in at the end of August and found myself paired with a very mild mannered and lovely roommate. I spent most of my time at class, at Leela's, or at the gym. I was running 3 miles more than every other day on a post-break up diet (that is..very little in my tum tum), and was going to bed by 11. This is pretty good, minus my "diet", for a college student.
Regardless of my new independence and dedication to my physical state, i still didn't like myself. I found myself constantly having destructive thoughts over things that had happened in my past relationship or things that were happening with my new crush. I was angry that I thought so much and just wanted to be in a mentally quiet place. This is when I started to really dedicate time into my World Religions class. I was going on field trips to Mosques, Buddhist Temples, and frequented a Meditation Center in the city. I was starting to find peace in learning about different cultures. I loved people and found it to be a new source of happiness. Something I hadn't felt during my senior year of high school. I spent most of my time with the person who knew me best, and ignored, like most young peeps my age who have a serious boyfriend, just about everybody else. Even now I can't say I regret doing that. I'm surrounded by people now who stuck it out through all of my crap and know that they are the ones who will love and support me to the end.

Learning was something i found peace in, so I wanted to pour whatever I had left into it. I was starting to work on my research paper which I had decided would be about Buddhism, both reformed and conservative. It was a brilliant assignment and pushed me outside of my comfort zone. The class, to say the least, changed my life. If you go to Temple University, I'm sure there are many brilliant professors who teach this course (or a similar one), but Professor Leonard Swidler was my professor and I owe a great deal to him for my experience in his class. He's awesome. PAX!

All of these different realizations, soul-searching experiences, and assignments I had during the Fall were all leading up to this. About a week before Thanksgiving, I was feeling expecially down. I enjoyed my World Religion class, but felt my general courses were wasting my time and in no way contributing to my self-growth (often times..they really aren't designed to help you in that way, only to get you a required few credits..i know, awesome, right?) Anyway, I was frustrated with the system. The man was getting to me and I wanted to just shake everything up and see what was in store for me next. At this point, by the way, I had become interested in Drexel University. Philly is great and Drexel's Interior Design program seemed to be what I wanted, so I was really trying to get over there the next year to continue my education. Something still didn't click though. The school's curriculum seemed so organized and perfect yet I still felt like I wouldn't be happy somehow. I wanted it to go away so I thought by just sticking it out, I would find reassurance that Drexel was the best option and that my happiness awaited me there. I sat down with my Dad that weekend and just started talking. He's really good at talking. Perhaps a little more reserved to an outsider, but he's a silly and wonderful man I'm proud to call my Dad. I told him I was un happy at Temple and didn't want to live there. I mentioned maybe commuting from home would be better and that I could just stick out the second semester there so when I transferred, I wouldn't be "behind" with the number of credits I had gotten that year. "Behind", as my Dad quickly pointed out, is self defined. No school or Professor or parent can ever tell you you're behind after you get out of high school. It's up to you. My Dad then proceeded to ask a question that will be with me until I die. "Why would you stay there if you aren't happy?" As Virgos often do, I thought of a million reasons why I should continue there, but none of them seemed to justify why I would voluntarily remain unhappy for the next 4 months. It's my life afterall. So an "I don't know" was my final answer. I sat there, feeling frustrated and defeated for a good while when from a desperate part within me, I finally said something logical. "I would be happier saving Sea-Turtles, Dad, than going back to Temple..."

So with a smile, Dad said, "Don't count that idea out."

This conversation is so vividily locked into my head. From the moment I said anything about sea turtles that night, I knew something had changed. It was that thing I had been waiting for. That moment of change where I could pack my bags and get out of here for a little while to find happiness. From my mentioning of the idea, I had almost expected a little bit of hesitation from my Mom or friends but was instead bombarded with "that sounds freakin awesome, do it. do it now." My mom and Dad were so gung ho about me going on my little journey, it left little space for my mind to fill intself with doubts. I now had a job to do. and it didn't include finals.

The original idea had been to go down with two board members of the Tecolutla Turtle Preservation Project, a non-profit started 5-ish years ago by Laura Kiehner with the support of her husband Scotty. This trip would take place in the middle of February for approximately 5 days. The two board members, among others members who couldn't make this trip, were my Dad, the almighty Pete Bretz, and Lazaro Herrera. I would go down in February and stay until the beginning of July when I would be returning to Cancun anyway. This seemed too unreal a time-frame to be away from my family. I was the girl at camp who got homesick and going away for 5 months, even at 18, didn't seem realistic. Within the next month however, the 5 month period made it's way down to 2 months, April and May-the busiest months of the turtle season. This was a time period I felt I could do. Still, 8 weeks is a very long time away from your family, and with a language barrier, I assumed it would feel even longer, but as I've come to realize..this really is my family. They care for me just as they care for their daughter and never once have I felt alienated. Maybe a little uncomfortable, but never like I wasn't loved. The character of the group I am with every day is unmatchable and makes me smile.
There is a really awesome quote from Eat, Pray, Love that when I read, I felt like I was reading a mirror into my thoughts and the thoughts of my family: "Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it."
Mexico isn't around the world geographically but culturally it is a whole new world. And a brilliant new world at that.

April 6th, I slept all day

That pretty much says it. I slept until 2 30 or 3 today. I was in and out of sleep most of the night and then tired until 6 or so. I'm drinking alot of water though so I should be better soon. Right now Fernando and Irma have a friend over who is all about me drinking water. She is very sweet and I know I should be drinking water, but this woman is persistent. They are enjoying some wine right now, so that could be part of why she's all about me drinking water and "cheers'ing" me. Oh well..I'm going to bed soon. I think I'll get to the beach for a little bit tomorrow, but not much. I may sleep again. I'll just keep you posted about that one.

April 5th, Yeah..we knew I would sick eventually

(Sorry if most of this post sounds pretty un-enthused. I'm not feeling well)
I woke up at 6 to go with Noe and search the beach for Turtle nests. We only rode for two hours rather than the usual four. Either way, we didn't find any that morning. They were expecting alot to come in that morning because the North wind was coming in, making the beach a breezy, and cool place to lay eggs. At the end of the beach I got to drive the ATV. I actually prefer to just ride on the back. I don't have to multi task and can just look for tracks. Driving you have to keep your eyes open for tracks, big dips in the sand, drift wood, and turtles that might be coming on to the beach (when they first get on to the beach you have to keep your vehicle pretty far away so you don't scare her off). I was pretty un "animau" anyway so driving was not what I wanted to be doing. Over the past couple of days, I've been described as having "no animau". This means i'm not animated or excited or in the zone. Haha..kind of drifting off into space with a really sullen look on my face.
Noe and I returned and I went right to my room to and just layed down. I started to read my book but was pretty tired so I fell asleep. I woke up to Fernando knocking on my window, seeing if I was ready to go. He started apologizing when he realized I was sleeping and said not to worry about going out yet, and that I should just sleep. I said I would be ready to go in a little bit and that I would see him out there. I fell asleep for 15 minutes more, and went into the main house. I went into the house and had some lunch with Dulce, Irma, and Paty. Dulce is a girl who lives in the area I believe and works at the camp on the weekends. The first time I met her, I'm pretty sure she made fun of me to the max, but now we're good. She's very sweet. After I ate, Paty asked me to help her outside. I cleaned the baby turtles they have at the camp and put salt on the minor infections the little buggers had. After that Paty was ready to MOVE. She was rushing around getting sticks, and finding her hat so that we could go meet her friend that would drive us to the beginning of the beach. In Tecolutla, there is a certain amount of beach where no vehicles are permitted. There was an accident not too long ago and now driving on a 1.5 span of beach isn't aloud. We drove to where that 1.5 miles ends and started running. I'm not sure why we were running but we were. We found a turtle nest, along with two guys named Ruben and Jim. They were all about the Turtles and wanted to see what the fuss was about. Paty was already flustered with the running and finding of the nest, she started freaking out and having Ruben translate what I should be doing. I understood already, but with the language barrier, Paty wanted to be 100% sure. I waited by myself for a while until Noe came to help out. We collected the eggs of that nest and started walking. When you walk or ride on the beach, it's important to look back every once in a while. Those turtles can be anywhere! Anywho, we looked back at one point and saw Ruben and Jim running-a clear sign that a turtle was wherever they were running to. We walked back to the Turtle and waited with Ruben and Jim. Ruben speaks Spanish and English and Jim just English, so while the two of them asked questions or told stories in English, I did my best to translate what I could so Noe could feel apart of the conversation. If there is anything I've learned from being the only one, aside from Fernando, who speaks English, It feels good when someone tries and translates what's going on so you can feel included.
Noe and I walked after that until we met up with Fernando, who was driving the now working VW Dune Buggy.
Fernando and I spent the rest of the afternoon together, looking for nests which was nice. I can speak English with him and he can help translate words I want to know into spanish. He dropped me off at a nest while he went down to the end of the beach to mark other nests. I have developed this little habit of singing when I'm alone with the turtles. I make up words to tunes that come into my head and It doesn't even matter if it makes sense, because no one can hear me anyway. When Fernando came back for me, we drove a little further to a Turtle that was still making her nest. I've been trying to find the right moment to ask him what the TTPP can do for them next, but haven't found a moment to bring it up when I can get a detailed answer. While we waited he said that they needed more vehicles for the beach and more people to work there during turtle season. So for the TTPP, I think more ATVs would be a good next step, and working toawrds another campsite would be a good second step. This season they are looking at getting 500 nests, and within the next few years, double that. They are going to need more space for regular helpers and nests.

After collecting those eggs, we decided to go down to the end of the beach to just double check that we hadn't missed any nests. From where we were to the end of the beach is about 35 minutes of driving. We started talking, and since he has met my dad, he asked about my Mom and what she did. I told him she was Una Maestra de Voz (voice teacher). We also talked about her visit to Tecolutla in May! He said we would wait for her at the bus station with a Mariochee Band. Then he asked if I sang. Whenever anyone hears my mom can sing and asks me if I can, I always say a little. Everytime. He said he wouldn't look if I would sing him something (usually when someone stares right at you, you get a little intimidated). I sang him some Enrique and his expression was so adorable I couldn't stand it. I guess somewhere after my musical debut and Fernando telling me, "you need to learn curse words, its is necessary." I started to feel sick. I'm not sure if it was because the buggy was so close to the ground, making bumps feel bigger than they were, or if I was coming down with something that made me feel sick. All I know is that I needed to get out of that car. We got back to camp and Irma had cut up some Papaya and made tea for me. I really don't like Papaya. I've eaten it everyday I've been here, hoping that my feelings for the fruit would change, but alas, they haven't. I sat with Fernando, Irma, and Dulce for a while before I really couldn't take the stomach pains without wanting to cry. I excused myself, and went back to my cabin. I tried to get comfortable on my bed so I watched Little Miss Sunshine (yes, again..I'm going to know every word of that movie by the time I come back). About half way through, however my stomach had different plans. Now I won't go into yucky details, but I threw up alot. I started experiencing vertigo shortly after and yelled for Noe who was sleeping in the cabin next to me. He speaks zero English, so luckily my Spanish was decent enough to convey the message, "Where's Fernando, I need Fernando. I can't open the door right now. One moment please. I want the doctor. I can't feel my hands." I finally made it out of the cabin and found Fernando just getting back to the house. They had wanted to take me to the Doctor earlier but I didn't want to go anywhere in the bumpy car. Now I was ready. The doctor said I had a Gastric Intestinal Infection...or something along those lines. I'm pretty sure it was that bad batch of beans from Thursday. I got a shot in my bum and some medicine. It was terrific. We got back in the car and Aurorita was so cute. She started blowing bubbles, trying to make me feel better. and you know what, they helped haha.
Fernando and Irma had me sleep in Aurorita's room so they could keep an eye on me if anything happened and I needed them. They truly are a wonderful family. Considering I'm in a foreign country, without family, or people who can really speak the same language as I, I feel pretty at home. My Spanish is getting better, however, so I really can't complain. I think I fell alseep around 9 and woke up multiple times during the night. Being sick is pretty lame.

April 4th, I learn that the words I´m practicing are all inuendos

I was up by 8 this morning, assuming that the day would be similar to yesterdays. Instead, when I got out of my cabin and to the front of the campsite, Fernando was talking with Ramido, Noe, y Paty and told me to go inside and make some food. He wasn't feeling well because the previous night we had had some bad beans. I was feeling it a bit too but things weren't too bad if you know what I mean. He took a 30 minute nap while I ate. Somewhere during that period Ramido made eggs and brought Paty and Noe some breakfast. Paty told me to sit outside with them so we could all practice our other languages. Over the course of the trip, I've been writing down conjugations to different words and key phrases. I shared all of these with them and they were surprisingly enthusiastic. We sat for almost an hour with me saying words in spanish, repeating it in english, and then working on my pronunciation. I have a feeling there will be much of this in the future. As I like learning Spanish, they enjoy learning English. It's a nice trade off.

After a little bit of practice, Ramido and I set off onto the beach to search for turtle nests. He stopped at a small market to buy some cookies for the both of us and a water. I swear, this boy has so little, and still finds pesos to buy me cookies. I'm going to slip a ton of pesos into his bookbag by the end of this trip, HE WON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HIT HIM. I'll leave a note explaining that its for all the cookies. We rode the beach for about 4 hours, and found nada. The turtle prefer to lay their eggs when the weather is cool and winds are coming in from the north. I mean I wouldn't want to give birth to 100 little eggs in the middle of the day under a mucho calor sun with not wind. That would suck, lets face it. Near the end of our ride, we pulled over in the shade. I had to use the facilities, aka pee behind a big wall with "Corona" painted on it. We then talked for almost 45 minutes in Spanish. It wasn't too monumental , but the small talk was good practice and the first conversation I've had in Spanish thus far. Yeah..don't ask me how I've been getting by. I don't know.

We got back to camp and ate the dinner Paty had been preparing. Haha everytime anyone asks if I cook, I tell them no...I like Cereal, they have a hard time believing that. I'm thinking most women here have a decent understanding how to cook and the fact that they think I survive off of cereal is probably crazy. NO MATTER. During dinner we talked in broken english-spanish and overall had an enjoyable meal. At the end of the meal, Kilos the fishman rode up on his bike. He's such a strange character-very nice, but so weird. That is probably why me and him get along so well. He makes really silly faces and speaks to me so quickly, then expects me to understand. I know he's probably joking unless he makes a very serious face. He does this when I say ANYTHING in spanish. Anywho, Kilos and I took the one ATV that is a little broken to the Mechanic about 3 kilometers away. We walked back and pretended to talk to each other. Actually, I can't even say that. I do a fine job making small talk. It's following all of Fernando's sexual inuendos I can never understand. He told me that everyone in the camp flows really well together and is always making some kind of inuendo. I told him I was never going to learn Spanish that way and that when I did get home, I wouldn't be able to say anything other that dirty jokes. We chuckled.

Now I'm at the internet place and winding down. I really do like it here. I've met some wonderful people thus far who have really made me feel at home. ALSO if anyone has questions, feel free to ask!! I'm going to get here as frequently as possible. In the case that I have a really long day, I probably will just go to bed, but I'll be as on top of this as I can be!

April 3rd, !SO MANY HUEVITOS!

Today was MAGNIFICENT. I was up around 7 45, and on the beach by 8. I walked for a little less than 2 hours looking for nests before I found one! My instructions were to walk until I found one, and then to stay with it until Fernando or Noe came to help me. I was by myself and walking until I walked over some tracks. I followed those suckers to behind a sand dune where I could see sand flying up into the air. My imediate reaction to the flying sand was, "frick oh my god, LOOOOK!!!! FRICK!!!" and sure enough...a momma tortuga all by her lonesome was building a nest. This was the first one I'd ever seen and I got to experience it by myself. It felt quite special. I took some pictures and just sat down, probably 15 feet away. She hadn't finished building the nest (which takes about 10 minutes) when Fernando pulled up on his shiny white mo-ped, sporting the sexiest gemmed baby phat sunglasses I'd ever seen. He told me that when she is building the nest, you have to stay very far away. When she starts laying the eggs, you dig a hole behind her, exposing the eggs, and then collect them. The eggs are super sensitive to sunlight so you cover them with sand and use your shadow to keep them shaded. Then they are put into a plastic bag and into the darkness of a cooler or basket until they are re-located on the beach, or taken back to camp. On the previous visit, Fernando was telling my dad that there are approx. 100 eggs per nest, and about 100 nests. The eggs per nest part is true but the nest part is a little under. Fernando told me they were expecting about 500 NESTS with 100 or so eggs each. SO MANY HUEVITOS.

At this location, Noe and a man named Juan arrived on their ATVs. Fernando instructed me that I would be riding with Juan so I didn't have to walk up and down the beach. Juan spoke a little English and the Spanish that he spoke to me with, he was sure to speak clearly and slowly. He told me he was 38, with three kids and a wife named Nancy. Between Juan and myself, we found 7 turtles building nests, in which only 4 actually laid eggs. They are extremely picky and that is why the nest building portion of the program is extremely important. If you mess that up, they go back to the ocean.

By the end of the day, I had been out on the beach for 9 1/2 consecutive hours. Fernando sent lunch out for me by ATV. I must say I have become quite efficient at spotting and retrieving eggs. I'm not sure if I can add that to my resume though. The day was wonderful, regardless of how much sun I took in. I had dinner when we got back around 5 45pm, and then showered and was in bed by 7. I watched Juno, returned a call to poppa bear (the first phone call home aside from Lazaro helping my poor self at the complicated airport), and was asleep by 8 45. It was the earliest I've been to bed in I have no idea how long. All I know, is that it felt great.

April 2nd, Monse leaves me to fend for myself

OK. This day was not too eventful. It was Monse's last day, so Fernando said it was alright that I just spent it with her and not on the beach. She had a few errands to run and people to say goodbye to so I just tagged along. We went to Tecolutla's Government building in the center square, to a small restaurant for breakfast, and then to a man named "Felix" 's house. He is a school teacher in Tecolutla and speaks English. He was very nice and offered me Spanish lessons . Irma made it a point that I met him because she gets a little jumpy when she does't know what I'm saying. He's one of her close friends and told her if she needed anything translated, to just give him a call.

After running errands, Irma, Aurorita, Monse, and I went to see a ranch in La Victoria. La Victoria is like the equivelent to a gated community. It's very pretty compared to the rest of the "neighborhoods", if you can even call the other places neigborhoods. Fernando wants to use a large plot of land their to extend the work he does. He'll use the land their to build a reserve for Lizards, Iguanas, and I imagine a few other things, but those two would take up the majority of space. The ranch was quite beautiful and large, and although Fernando couldn't be there with us to check out the space, I'm sure he would have thought the same. I'm not sure what the next step for the Lizard/Iguana preserve is though. This could be a job for the summer or next Spring, I have no idea. I'll let you know when I found out more.

When we arrived home, Irma made dinner for Monse and myself and we all enjoyed a final meal together before Monse's departure. Her bus was scheduled to leave at approx 11 45pm. After dinner, we just hung out in my cabin for a bit. I showed her pictures of my family, and she showed me pictures of hers. She told me that when I come back up to Mexico City from Tecolutla, I was more than welcome to stay with her and that if my Mom was with me, she would be more than welcome as well. Monse's friendship has helped me feel really at home. I can truly consider her a great friend and a wonderful person, who always has good intentions. Or as Fernando described her as having, "A pure heart."

April 1st, My first of many 20 hour days.

FIRST OF ALL, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY WONDERFUL AUNT MONICA. I have been thinking about family constantly down here and so at times, wishing I could be with them for birthdays, when life gets hard, sunday dinners, and puppy training classes. In the same breath, I know I couldn't be doing those things right now. I am supposed to be here, for an underlying reason that will make itself clear in time.

Today...was very long. I can't even say it's the longest day ever, because I'm pretty sure the day I flew here was the longest day ever. I'm also quite sure that I will have many more days like the one I had today, but probably under harsher conditions. Last night, Monse informed me that she was going to be getting up around 6 to see the sun rise and go out on the ATV to find turtle nests. She said she would be back around 9 and that at that time we could get breakfast, and go into town. Little did I know I was part of the game plan. I should honestly just have expected it. I was woken up the same time as Monse was, but instead of 6am, it was about 3 30am. I would be going with Fernando in the truck while Monse was out on the ATV. I waited from 3 45 to 5 30 for Fernando to return with Irma and Aurorita (They were taking a bus in from Mexico City and were supposed to get back around 4am). I watched spanish "Bewitched", spanish "Recess", and some fabulous spanish music videos while I waited, so that totally made waking up so early worth it.

Driving on the beach while the sun is rising isn't a monumental view on the side of the beach we were on. It gets lighter but you can't see the sun. It's kind of like on stag island where you have to be on the right side to see the sun rise and set because it changes.

Monse and Noe (the boy who was driving) found one turtle nest. Fernando and I got out and looked but Monse and Noe had already collected the eggs to bring back to the camp. We drove until 8 30 or so and with no more luck on the turtle front, we returned back to camp. Monse and I went to the Library after we got back so she could return some books she had borrowed. The man who ran the library was very sweet and said if I needed anything, I was more than welcome to come in. He was going on vacation, however, and wouldn't return until April 10th. We walked back to camp and ate breakfast. Then at about 12 we went back to the beach. I don't even think it was 12, actually. It felt like 4 in the afternoon but it was only 11 30am or so. Anyway, Monse, Fernando, Fernando's friend, and myself drove up and down the beach. There is a point on the beach where it ends and you have to cross a bit of a mote to get to the other section of the beach. I wore jeans today so in rolling them up I was really hoping they wouldn't get soaked. That did not happen at all. i walked around for the rest of the afternoon with really wet pants. we walked around for another hour in one spot, just relaxing and looking at shells, and then returned back to the mote. We crossed and went to a huge shack that had coconuts, bloody marys, and crackers. I ate the crackers. In the few hours that we had been driving, Fernando and his friend had been smoking alot, and I guess I feel like an asshole, but it was so nauseating after about the 5th set the two had. After everyone had eaten and drank, we went back to the car and i asked as politely as I knew how if they couldn't smoke while we were in the car. Ha, I was sort of like that poor kid who's in their car seat in the back of the car, while mom smokes in the front seat, not even thinking twice that although the windows are open, the air gets sucked back in because my window's open. They understood though and only made one pit-stop to smoke.

We got back to camp around 4 45 and I felt like I wad going to vomit. I went back to my house and instead of sleeping, I read Eat, Pray, Love. I was emotionally stressed because I couldn't understand what people had been saying, I was hot and sun-burned, and a bit sleep-deprived. I just wanted to be in my own world without feeling stupid for not understanding what people were saying. I was feeling like I had missed out on my opportunity to learn spanish while I was in PA and that I was just going to have to deal with it now. I was angry with myself.

Reading always helps though..it kind of takes you to another place away from your thoughts. I relaxed and felt good for the first time that day. I read Eat, Pray, Love for 2 hours and cried for the majority of that time. I really can't even pin-point why I was crying. I mean, it is a good book, but c'mon...crying for two hours while not even inside your own head. It was probably a combination of the heat and being exhausted from waking up so early.
I opted out of getting dinner with Monse. My stomach was still upset and I just wanted to be in my bed. I guess I read for another hour when Monse stopped by and told me that Irma was worried and wanted to know if I needed to see the doctor tomorrow. Irma and I have exchanged "gracias' " and "de nada's" but that is about it. Now she wants to take me to the doctor after a small stomach ache, and then decides that it would be very important for me to meet Felix, a school teacher in Tecolutla who teaches English. Still emotional from the book and the heat, i almost started to cry right in the middle of monse's prepared speech. I'm so glad I know these people. seriously, they care so much and barely even know me. This is what makes me feel at home. It's wonderful.

I passed out around 11 30, after I watched Little Miss Sunshine on the computer. My 20 hour day was truly exhausting, but somehow I made time for Dwayne and his Uncle's "silly" homosexuality.

March 31st, My first day of work.

It's Monday and officially my first day of work. I woke up at 10 for my big day..I know..I shouldn't wake up too early. It might spoil all the fun. The first thing I did was try to work out getting back into my cabin without a key. I told Ramido in very broken spanish that I left my keys in my house and couldn't get back in, so in response he took the entire tin of keys, and sat in front of my cabin door trying to find the one that would open it. I told him I was really sorry, and he said not to worry about it in comforting hand gestures. Fernando did return sometime between 11 and 11 30. He knew where the key was and let me back in. I was then informed that I would be riding the ATV with Ramido to look for nests for the rest of the afternoon.
So from 12 45 to 4 15, Ramido and myself rode up and down the beach. We rode all the way up...and all the way back to where we got on the beach...and then about 3/4 of the way back...then returned to camp. It wasn't only riding however. We made a few stops. The first was to a beach front house, where we delivered food from the main land and a 2 liter bottle of coca cola.
After we drove for another 10 minutes, we found our first nest! The process of finding, marking, taking care of etc goes a little like this. First, you look for tracks and when you find them, you get out of/off of your vehicle and examine the area. Second, you take a pointy stick and carefully poke through the sand to see if the sand is loose. If it is, then you've found a nest. You then proceed to un-cover and check that the eggs are safe and indeed exist. You re-cover the eggs to create a flat surface, and with your squared shovel, you carefully dig a 4 ft/4 ft square, with the nest at the center of the square. Then dig about 3 inches deep and lay the 4ft/4ft piece of chicken fence wire so that it covers the entire area you've dug out. Re-bury the wire and make the scene look spotless so volunteers from the camp don't stop to check the nest! This is done by brushing away the tracks and dragging large pieces of drift wood around the nest. This prevents people from stepping on the nest, and cars/ATVs etc from driving over them. Then you must mark where you've been in a notebook in order to find the nest when you go back to collect the eggs. ( I know it sounds like I'm somewhat rambling, but this is being written on Tuesday morning at about 8 45. I've been up since 3 30 this morning. My brain stopped working a while ago). BUT BACK TO THE GOOD STUFF. For this particular nest, Ramido painted an abandoned woven basket blue and put it at the top of the nest. He dated the page and drew a detailed map, much like an archeologist would. He said we would be back for the eggs later, but that we were keeping the eggs there for some other reason..I didn't catch what that reason was so I just let it happen. Then we left the scene, to return another day.

The next stop we made was in the middle of no where. We stopped for about 10 minutes, and ate some oatmeal cookies. Ramido asked if I wanted a coconut from the palm trees, and although I wasn't thirsty or hungry anymore, I wanted to see him climb the tree to get them. I made his way up and dropped about 7 on the ground. He cut the top off of two so we could drink the juice that was inside. The green coconuts, by the way, taste nothing like brown coconuts that have the weird hair all over them. The juice/water inside of the green ones tastes like warm, poorly sugared water. I imagine it's good for you. The skin-textured inside that you can eat, tastes like nothing. It tasted weird but he did climb up a tree to get me one, so I ate/drank it. Now for those of you who do not know Ramido, he is approx. 20 years old, married, and has two children. So just calm down kids, the coconuts meant nothing but friendship. Anyway, after we had our own coconuts, he cut the skin off the 6 other coconuts, bagged them, and brought them back to the camp. I rinsed my hands off in the ocean and we rode another 40 minutes back to camp.
There were a couple people sitting outside the camp that we went to talk to when Ramido and I returned. One 17 year old girl, who had been laughing at me the night before, was there that afternoon and I guess had a change of heart and was being very kind. Monse said that they made fun of her the first few days she was there and that I shouldn't take it personally or feel bad. After talking, I hurried back to my room to take care of some work. I guess I was in there for about an hour, when Monse came over and said it was time to go into town. She needed money and I needed to the internet. After taking care of our errands, we got dinner in town and talked for a while. She is such a good person. She tells me that I have to ask for certain things because she won't do it. This is a nice shove into the language. Her intentions are always good, however, and her friendship has been wonderful in getting me adjusted to my new home.

ALSO..
The man who runs the library is named Chencho Santiago..I don´t want to forget. So I´m writing it here!